I Forget

Sometimes......
I forget that I am young.
I forget that I should live.
I forget that there is always time.
I forget to keep faith.

Sometimes I just forget.

At times, you open your eyes and you seem to see life through the same lens all over again and past discoveries seem new. For me, this seems to happen repeatedly. Am I the only one who resents this? Am I the only who is blindsided and the world stops spinning because I have to get my bearings once again? This cycle seems never ending.  I'll hold onto my faith but then shove it aside once again. I empower myself yet I am also the hand that destroys every safe haven built. My life is consumed and I resent this oh so much.....

I forget what life was like before.  I forget what  life was like before the bitterness permanently scarred me.  I forget how it is to not be consumed by profound sadness at random moments. I forget so much yet hold on to much more.

I do not forget that this is my path.  I do not forget that this experience has molded me into a more worldly, mature woman.  I know most of all that I will never forget these struggles.

For now there will be progress but also regression.  I will take two steps forward and maybe move ten steps back. I will keep trudging along though because I have to. Staying focused on the future keeps me grounded.  There is so much I need to do and so much that I have to accomplish. I will achieve these first then worry once again later.  It is the only way to to keep the cycle of remembering and forgetting continuous. Without both of these I'm afraid my learning and evolving might indeed stop.  Besides, what are we without adversity?

~Until next time